my california sensibilities are challenged

[liminal_space]

let me start by saying that IN THEORY, i am not against hunting. i UNDERSTAND the need for reducing populations of animals, i UNDERSTAND that some people do it to feed their families. what i DON'T understand is how people can do this and get such gleeful joy out of killing a living, breathing creature that, just like us, trembles before the face of death. 

it's hunting season here in minnesconsin, and just...ugh. we have all decided that it's best if i stay on our property for orange jacket time. fuckers. 

~

it's cold, people. low 20s F and i don't necessarily hate it (there's been a lack of wind), but i don't necessarily love it, either. it takes a fuck-all amount of time to layer up for this type of weather and i find myself being lazy and NOT layering and just sucking it up. i actually went outside in shorts and a sweatshirt when it was in the 30s and didn't die. 

we have had no snow to speak of, and according to the national weather people and ryan hall, y'all (my favorite youtube weatherman), this is going to be a really mild winter here! =D thank you, el nino! i guess last year was one of the highest snow falls in like 20 years, so i'm glad i missed that one. 

~ 

thanksgiving sort of....didn't happen. 

we had kid's grandparents over for her birthday dinner (2 days before thanksgiving) and the next day i was not feeling great. thanksgiving day was a wash because the not-great had turned into almost-bad so mister just made steaks and green bean casserole and baked potatoes....he even did my cranberry sauce, so all i had to do was eat. after cooking for kid's birthday (two trays of homemade enchiladas, each with different fillings and homemade spanish rice), i appreciated that. =D

his parents usually do their thanksgiving on the saturday after (today), so mister and kid are going over in a few hours. i still feel a little under the weather and don't want to people, so i'm staying home to monitor old man onslow. 

as far as the sick goes, it's WEIRD. i don't feel bad physically (well, i did on thursday), but lack of sleep has been getting to me. what's keeping me up? i'm wheezing on each exhale (right in the lower trachea region) and it keeps me awake because it whistles and is high pitched. i caught myself trying to make it sound a tune at 3 in the morning one night and realized i was getting a little loopy. 

yesterday i felt MUCH better and today i think i'm close to ALL THE WAY better. there's still a bit of a wheeze, but last night it was so minimal that i was able to sleep. 

~

this month was a record for me pissing people off on livejournal. i had TWO people remove me from their friend's list — one did it without fanfare and the other made a small, pissy little production that made me laugh. 

the first removed me because i asked if she had asked permission to take photos of residents in her mother's nursing facility. the photos showed elderly people in a place where they should have an expectation of privacy and the photos captured them in very...vulnerable poses. i tried to ignore the photos at first, but i kept thinking how i would feel if someone had taken those photos of my mom when she was in a recovery/nursing center. 

the second seems to have removed me because i didn't interact with her enough. 

that's ok. i actually DON'T interact with any of you as much as i would like to, mostly because i read you on my phone and detest with a hot, fire-red passion typing things out on my phone. i always seem to make multiple typos and i sound like a complete idiot — it makes me cringe. 

the only reason i'm mentioning this defriending is....oh, fuck, let's face it. i can call it what i want but it's chismosa. i miss chismosa. 

~

we've been doing most of our gift buying online — the sales are just too good to avoid this year. i'm going to try to get to a few local places to buy small-business, but it's harder here! for the kid, there are practical things (muck boots, warm items), art things (she got a pottery wheel for her birthday and we're getting her glazes and a kiln for giftmas...plus i found some really nice metallic watercolors for her), and we'll supplement with gift cards to places so she can pick out her own treasures. i miss when i could buy her clothes and she loved them all....

i'm not sure what to do about mister and need to talk to him about that. i'm sure he doesn't have any ideas about stuff for me, either, and at this point, we need to avoid buying STUFF and be more thoughtful. why? because there's no room for more STUFF until i can figure out shelving and book cases. =\ 

maybe i could convince him another golden retriever would be a good idea. =D oh, i do want a tall stone gargoyle to decorate for holidays. there's nothing cuter than a little gargoyle wearing a leprechaun hat and little green cowl for st. patrick's day. 

~ 

my house still hasn't sold, but i'm far less OMFG IT IS CURSED about it than i was just a few weeks ago. i am making an effort to let it happen in its own time --sometimes i succeed, sometimes i fail. 

i'm trying to break out of the negative thinking loop with various things, but it's been a struggle. i think i'm going to carve out some time every day to just sit and read — make it protected time and keep my ass planted so i don't find "other things" to do. i bought the new murderbot diaries book and was super excited until it got here — it's so LITTLE! SO FEW PAGES! it's more a snack than a meal, and i hate that. but i love murderbot, so....

mister got the laser set up, so i'm going to be making STUFF and THINGS soon. that makes me happy. one thing i'm going to work on is making a book nook of diagon alley; it's been in the works for ages now and it's time to do it. *nod*

ok. time to go. this entry has been interrupted about 17 times and it's time to do a few more things on my check-off list. ;)