easy come, girl....easy go

+ it's been raining on and off, so of course the horses had to roll and make themselves into mud pies. oh, what fun. :)

+ you know how there's /regular/ clean and then /company/ clean? yesterday i was sure i was company ready, but apparently i'm full of shit. all day has been cooking and prepping and cleaning....and i'm ready to quit for the night, but i can't. we're gone all day tomorrow for kid's birthday and i'm hoping to do nothing in the evening when we get home beyond sitting with her on the couch watching dragula. 

earlier today, i was thinking how being a parent is just weird. you get this bundle of newborn potential in your arms and are sent home with no instruction manual, no real guide on how to Do The Right Thing by your bebe to ensure that you nurture and foster their nature to help them become the best THEM they can be. 

and you fuck up. no matter how hard you try NOT to, you fuck up. you fuck up because you're human and your new little human is a chaotic mass of incarnate stardust and all you can really do is always, ALWAYS try to do better, to do right by them. 

then, time passes, and you're remembering that chaotic mass of wee'un while looking at the adult in front of you and you can't help but think to yourself, "how did she turn out so amazing when she has YOU for a parent?" 

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